All The Teenage Rage

1.Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on the dog's tail we had to change his name to Beaver.

2.Yo mama's so fat, when the cops see her on a street corner they yell, "Hey you guys, break it up!"

3.Yo mama's so fat, even Richard Simmons laughs at her!

4.Things Your Mom Would Never Say to You:
a.How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?
b.Yeah, I used to cut class a lot too.
c.Let me smell that shirt - don't worry, it's good for another week.
d.Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be glad to feed and walk him every day.
e.That outfit isn't sexy enough, here, unbutton your blouse.
f.Why don't you hitchhike? It would totally be cheaper.
g.The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm running a prison around here.
h.Don't clean your room so often. It makes the rest of the house look bad.
i.Can I borrow your new speed metal CDs?
j.Naw, you don't have to call me, I'll eventually figure it out if you're in trouble.

5.Yo' mama so dumb, she waited at a STOP sign until it said GO!

6. Yo mama's so big, fat and clumsy, when she tried to get to Wal-Mart, she stumbled over K-Mart and landed right on Target.

7.What is grosser than gross?

A pancake that has fallen on the kitchen floor and you are very hungry for a pancake, but when you pick it up you find the gooey syrup and the creamy butter have acted like a kind of flypaper and so your spongey, yummy pancake is covered in lint, dustmites, a splotch of still-moist mustard from the night before, a broken match, and of course millions of squirming, pulsing bacteria. Poor pancake... and you were so hungry.....so you ate it.